and that's how the fight started......

How fights start

When I got home last night, my wife demanded
that I take her someplace expensive.... so, I took
her to a gas station..... and then the fight started....

*******************************************
I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller
Light for $14.95. Instead, she bought a jar of cold
cream for $7.95. I told her the beer would make
her look better at night than the cold cream.
And that's when the fight started.

********************************************
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to
apply for Social Security. The woman behind the
counter asked me for my driver's license to verify
my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had
left my walletat home. I told the woman that I was
very sorry, but I would have to go home and come
back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof
enough for me' and she processed my Social Security
application.

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my
experience at the Social Security office. She said, 'You
should have dropped your pants. You might have
gotten disability, too.
And then the fight started.....

***********************************************
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school
reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging
her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table. My wife
asked, 'Do you know her?' Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old
girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after
we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't
been sober since.' 'My Goodness!' says my wife, 'Who
would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started.....